We’re all thankful for the good things in our lives: A job, a well-running vehicle, a place to live, family, boyfriends, girlfriends, BFFs, health, all the things we take for granted each and every single minute of the day.

What is your attitude though when bad things come into your life? You lose your job; your car breaks down and it’s going to cost a ton to fix it; you get sick; a break in a relationship whether it’s family, a friend or an acquaintance; the death of a loved one.

I am certainly not going to discount the angry or grieving process – we all need it to work through it – and it can take weeks, months, even years. What I’m talking about is when you can get past that, how do you reminisce on it; the lingering memories, are they sour?

This is my personal philosophy in life: I’ve found that when you become disillusioned with someone or them with you; a person you are friend’s with is no longer a friend to you; there is a loss of someone you love either through a break in a relationship or through death; after the healing process is complete, step back and look at the whole picture of where you are now because of that person’s appearance in your life. What effect did he or she have on your life? It doesn’t matter how long or short a time that person was there but they were indeed put there for a reason – to help you grow into the person God intended you to be. God makes no mistakes. I don’t believe he makes bad things happen but I do believe he allows them to happen to teach us what he wants us to learn or to guide us, shift us, in the direction we should be headed.

Before you start saying “oh, that’s easy for you to say since you’ve never…” Stop right there. Yes, I have. I have lost through broken relationships, I have lost through death, I have had major health concerns, I have had financial crises. But I am enough removed from all of it that I can look at it objectively and say I like who I am not “despite” of it, but “because” of it. With this attitude, for starters, you’re not so afraid of “what if” any longer. There is no need for revenge, for payback; no more hurt feelings; no lingering feelings of sadness over loss. Wouldn’t it be amazing if everyone took this attitude of acceptance?

Would I change any of it if I had the power to say, mend relationships or bring people back? Probably not. Who knows what kind of life I would be bringing them back into or the kind of person I would be, or wouldn’t be, had they stayed. I’m not all-seeing like God is and thank goodness I don’t get to make that decision. Like the saying goes, the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.

So, maybe “thankful” is too strong a word to use for the bad stuff but, I do have “gratitude” and trust that I’m being led towards a better tomorrow.

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  1. Very thought provoking post. Yes, I am grateful for the bad stuff, too. I am grateful my 7-year relationship with my last bf broke up, without which I would never have met my current sweet hubster. I’m grateful my grandfather passed away peacefully in his home of a natural heart attack, before the cancer he was diagnosed with progressed enough to cause him any form of suffering. And I know this sounds corny, but what doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger, no?

    Thank you for sharing.

  2. Good morning. Yes very thought provoking. Not sure I am thankful for the bad things but, I do believe that everything happens for a reason.I shared your blog post on my blog this morning. And I am thankful that you shared yours which helped me write mine :-))

  3. Bad stuff happens. My husband passed away after a one day illness but for him it would have been the way he wanted to go. He didn’t suffer much and would never want to be on life support or to live in a nursing home. It was his time and he completed his work on earth and God called him home.

  4. Even when the bad happens, I know others have it worse, and then it makes me feel better.

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